Biggest Dreams & Greatest Fears – Feb. 27th 2017

Hello everybody!  How are you all doing?

Today, as I told you the other day in the E-Scape article, this one will be about my dreams and my fears. To be honest, I have lots of dreams that I know I’ll never achieve… and loads of irrational fears.

Let’s kick it off with my fears because I feel like it’s going to be the weirdest part of the article.

  1. My first and probably biggest fear is loneliness. Not the fact of being left out, but loneliness as a state, as a moment in your life. The fact that you wake up in a double bed on your own, have breakfast on your own, go to uni talking to yourself because nobody else is there to listen anyway…
  2. My second fear comes from the first one: loneliness within a crowd of people. That’s the worst feeling ever because you see groups, couples, a whole damn class of 30 people you’re supposed to belong to but you feel invisible…
  3. My third fear is being forgotten. I feel like this also comes from the first fear. I am scared that someone might be better than me and they’ll take the little light I still have. I am scared that I might never be able to achieve a few of my dreams and that nobody will remember me once I’m gone or once I die or something…
  4. The last fear I’ll talk about today is losing the people I love. My family, my two best friends, my best girl friend, the guy I’m in love with, my friends from theatre, my theatre teacher… I know there are a lot of people there and I know that everybody ends up leaving for some reason or another but I really hate this saying. Why should people leave if they love their lives? Why should they leave the people they feel good with?

On a more positive note, let’s talk about dreams.

  1. My very first dream is to write a whole book, a whole novel. I have started a few but I am currently working on one that I am aiming to finish and it’s all about a girl falling in love and having dreams and fears and realizing that people aren’t always who they pretend to be… It’s about life, basically…
  2. My second dream, which I know for a fact will never come true is singing in front of people. Like a proper concert, a proper show. I’ve done it a few times already but it was always kind of a kids show and I feel like I’ve grown a lot since these shows and I wanna prove people that the songs I write and record are actually not too bad and that I’m not just a person you can say “Shut up” to every time they sing.
  3. My third dream is probably the craziest: meeting Joe Sugg and most of my favorite YouTubers. I happen to like Joe a whooooole lot (you may have understood if you read my other articles) and I really dream about the day when I’ll get to meet him and hug him and whatever else I can do to him. I mean, I even got his two books for bloody Christmas! (Thanks Mom and Dad)
  4. This next dream is one everybody has, I feel like: finding a guy I love and who loves me back, getting married like a proper princess in a long white dress with roses all around the place and bridesmaids and groomsmen and everything. Then, I want to have a family with kids and a dog (mostly a dog) and a house with a backyard.

 

Not gonna lie, I started writing this article this morning and it’s now 21:34. I’m currently listening to a few songs I haven’t listened to in months such as Asciendo by Ministry of Magic (Google it). I believe I started listening to it because it’s all about Harry Potter but I happen to like it a whole lot.
The song has changed, I’m now listening to Stitches by Conor Maynard. I love that guy. If I’m honest, I love the whole Joe, Conor, Caspar Lee and all the guys’ squad. The Buttercream squad as they call themselves. I mean… right. Are there any songs you love a lot? Please feel free to tell me and I’ll listen to them whenever I have some time.

Anyway, I’m going to go to bed now because I have a really rough day tomorrow and I need my beauty sleep. I love you all,

C.G xxx

 

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